Readers, and so it begins. The end of the year always brings out the best in us bloggers, doesn’t it? The other day, I had my iPod on shuffle and a song from The Carter IV came up. Upon hearing a specific lyric, I deduced that Lil Wayne isn’t the prolific emcee he used to be. Don’t get it twisted, I’m a Wayne convert of year’s past. The Carter II, III and Da Drought series are some of the best material you’ll ever hear from him. However, he’s had a penchant of half-assing it this year, and this list is the by-product of all that half-assing. There are definitely many more lists to come, and I thought I’d kick it off with a funny one.
The list is after the jump.
a. “Niggas think they fly / Make me check your flight mileage.”
- “Y U Mad” [Birdman's Bigga Than Life]
Ladies and gentleman, Lil Wayne the enforcer of all things fly.
b. “Hello world, I’m with a yellow girl, number two pencil.”
- “Strange Clouds” [B.o.B.'s Strange Clouds]
You gotta love that the next line begins with “These rappers is washed up…”
c. “I tongue kiss her other tongue / Skeet skeet skeet; water gun.”
- “The Motto” [Drake's Take Care]
Hope you “ate” your lunch already. Disgusting.
Top 10 Worst Lil Wayne Lyrics of 2011
10. “Fresh off of my bid, bitch it’s Lil Tunechi / I Lucille Ball; bitch I love Lucy.”
“Fire Flame (Remix)” [Birdman's Bigga Than Life]
After nearly a year in jail, THESE were his first bars?! Hashtag ‘c’mon maaaaaan.’
9. “But hold up wait, new position / I put her on my plate and then I do the dishes.”
- “Motivation” [Kelly Rowland's Here I Am]
Weezy’s bedroom talk is at an all time high.
8. “Met a female dragon, had a fire conversation.”
- “HYFR” [Drake's Take Care]
Thanks for clarifying that the dragon was in fact, a female. Can’t blame a guy for being thorough.
7. “Diamonds in my teeth like I’m a fucking dope dealer / You’re a dead man walking, Michael Jackson Thriller.”
- “Gucci, Gucci” [Sorry 4 The Wait]
I can’t get behind this shit at all. Too soon, guy.
6. “I’m falling for you baby, I need a parachute / So wet, I need a wetsuit.”
- “I’m Into You” [Jennifer Lopez's Love?]
I’m so amused, I need an amusedsuit.
5. “Everybody selling dreams, I’m too cheap to buy one.”
- “Blunt Blowin” [The Carter IV]
Funny you mention that, Weezy. I’m sure there are A LOT of producers whose dreams (see: beats) have yet to be paid for.
4. “But don’t fuck up with Wayne cause when it ‘Waynes’ it pours.”
- “How to Hate” [The Carter IV]
Look, I’m all about the puns, but this one is just silly.
3. “Boy I send them bloods at your ass like a tampon.”
- “Megaman,” [The Carter IV]
To tell the truth, I could’ve probably made a top 10 list from this song alone. Not to mention, this lyric is the sole reason that this list exists. Absolutely terrible.
2. “The Uzi go ‘brrr,’ Stutter” + “Sour Ds and a Swisher Sweet, Sweet and sour” + “I’m a fuckin assassin, you should jump in a casket.”
- “Roman’s Revenge 2.0″ [Nicki Minaj's Pink Friday]
I honestly couldn’t decide between the three of these, so let’s call it a tie.
1. “Wish I could take a shot of Ciroc with Pac / Sorry for the wait ’til my album drop.”
- “Tunechi’s Back” [Sorry 4 The Wait]
Nevermind the fact that this is a poor attempt at product placement, but I think Tupac would have a long list of things to do before he takes a shot with Biggie’s former right-hand man.
Hope you enjoyed this one. More to come soon – stay tuned, friends.